Monday, March 14, 2011

Met up with Serene they all.. Serene & Wendy told me to hold Dear back if I really can't live without him & don't think anymore.. I wanted to but don't have the courage to.. Coz I feel that Dear is already attached.. Sometimes he don't even reply my messages..

On our way home, Serene told me to ask whatever I wanted to know & tell him whatever I'm feeling. At least I've done what I needed to know & if things were really what I guessed, then at least I know I shouldn't pin anymore hope on this r/s anymore.. She told me I already know what I wanted but I'm just afraid.. True enough.. Told her when I asked if Dear is happier now, he told me he is.. In fact upon hearing this, it really made me think twice of asking him back.. Coz I really want him to be happier.. But it's really hurts that I can't be with someone I love so dearly.. I've got to give up coz of our differences whch we didn't managed to overcome.. Perhaps from the start we were straight forward enough, telling each other our feelings without hiding, things wouldn't turn out this way..

Perhaps I should face reality & ask him upright.. If he's really attached or don't love me anymore, I should just give up & stop pinning hope on this r/s anymore.. Though hurting but at least I will give my best to give up than holding on headlessly to a r/s that will never be mine again....

Just texted him asking if he's still out.. His reply was fast but when I asked if I can asked him something, he did not reply.. Still contemplating if I should call him or wait till a better time to ask.. I'm really lost.. I don't know what I should do now.. :( I really really feel like calling him but am afraid of spoiling his mood outside..

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04:20

He replied but he said "You don't like people ask u, why u want ask?" I don't know why he turned so defensive for no reason.. And it's really for no reason.. And the fact that I didn't dislike him asking me things, I just dislike the fact that the tone of his voice seems interogatting.. Sometimes, it's just about the tone.. If his tone is nicer & sounded more concern, I wouldn't have flared.. Told him that I just want to know 1 thing & after which I won't ask him a single thing in future.. I merely want to know what's his answer now.. To urge me & allow me to move on with my life..